Well it's two in the morning and I can't sleep. I already tried a bit of studying, but my brain can just absorb a certain amount of information about bacteria before it starts going haywire. So yeah. Here I am, writing again. Or ranting again. Whatever you wanna call it.
You see, as I was browsing through Facebook last Tuesday or Wednesday, I saw a quote saying, "Eventually, you have to forgive yourself for the mistakes you've made." Obviously, it struck me. I wouldn't be writing about it if it didn't, would I? Anyway, I just pondered on how true the quote was. I don't even know its origin, maybe it has one, maybe it doesn't. Nonetheless, it is true and I have been greatly affected by it.
As people who actually waste their time on reading this sad excuse for a blog know, I am a Christian. I know I also am a sad excuse for a Christian, but I did accept Jesus as my savior, and I do believe in God. Anyway, the point of me reminding you of my beliefs is that as I was praying tonight or last Friday night ('tis already Saturday in my time), I asked God why it is so easy for Him to forgive me for my sins when I, myself, find it really difficult to get over the wrong things I have committed. His answer came clearly and quickly (Call me crazy if you want; it's true anyway, I am crazy for God.) In fact, His response was a song. His answer was one of the songs I learned at the Musical Ministry in my college. It is a local song and it goes like this, "Paanong di kita ibigin? Paanong di ka patawarin? Bago man isilang sa lupa, ika'y akin nang inaruga..." It translates to "How can I not love you? How can I not forgive you? Even before you were born, I already cared for you." If I'm not mistaken, the lyrics of the song "Pagbabalik" by Fr. Manoling Francisco, SJ, originated from the Scriptures (in the Book of Jeremiah, I think). And it is through the Scriptures that God talks to us. We talk to Him through prayers. He talks to us through the Scriptures.
On the whole, we are humans. Some seem to be aliens (Hello, Dr. Sheldon Cooper; hullo, Mr. Bean) but the bottom line is, we make mistakes. There are times when we make bad choices, it doesn't mean we are bad, it just means we are not perfect. And being not perfect is fine. Making mistakes is normal. Sure it is hard to forgive ourselves, but eventually, we have to do it. We have to let go of the negative things that happened in the past. We have to move on from our previous mistakes. I'm not saying we should forget them; actually, we should remember the lessons we learned from them. Thus, what I'm saying is we should forget all the negativity that comes with our past mistakes. Even God loves us enough to forget all our sins and welcome us into His kingdom. Why should we let something that happened when we weren't as mature as we are now haunt us? Why should we exchange happiness and peace of mind for something that we cannot change? Of course, we can't change the past. But we can live in the present. And we should live in the present.
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